Gracie getting a bath in the kitchen sink

She had a gleam in her eye when she happily announced that today was doggie spa human torture day. I watched as she scurried around the house gathering her implements – combs, brushes, scissors, trimmers, and the most dreaded nail grinder. I thought about scampering for cover, but then remembered that my body was not made of jello like that of the household kitties, who conveniently slide under furniture during storms. So I just sat rigid on the sofa and only flinched a little when she picked me up.

It didn’t start out so bad, although I don’t know why she always gets the big cushy floor pillow to sit on during my grooming sessions, while I only get to rest at her feet. Seems like a raw deal to me. As the grooming begins she manipulates my body like a mad chiropractor. Doesn’t she know that what I really want is a long afternoon nap, or maybe just a good squirrel or two to chase in the backyard? Well at least I got some nice belly rubs through it all.

Uh oh, time now for the nail grinding machine. I will say it’s better than the trimmers she once used, but not much. I struggle and do my best to make her task difficult. She might as well suffer with me. There better be some treats at the end of this, that’s all I gotta say!

Finally the grooming is over and I am allowed outside for a break. When I come back inside the house for a nice rest, I find myself picked up once more and hustled off to the kitchen. What now? Oh no, she’s putting me in the kitchen sink with all that WATER!! I don’t like this one bit and climb onto the high spot in the middle of the metal sink, in my attempt to escape. She mumbles something about me “smelling like dead fish in an aquarium”. Well I don’t know what an aquarium is, but I think fish smell good. Hey lady, I’m a DOG. I’m supposed to smell like this. She also keeps insisting that this isn’t a lake and I won’t drown, but as far as I’m concerned this looks like a little lake to me and I want OUT!

The good stuff…the hair dryer!

Just when I’m starting to resign myself to this further torture I suddenly find my feet back on the floor. I give my body some good shakes to rid myself of the water and zoom down the hallway towards the bedroom, knowing full well now what will come next. I’ll have my clean fur dried by the marvelous blow dryer. Yeah, I know, you would think I would hate it, but I actually like this part of the spa treatment. Just don’t even think about painting my nails, OK? And hey, where’s that treat?

Now time for a treat!!

Do your doggies love their grooming sessions?

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